Tool Tester Gifts

"I haven't a clue what it does, but I don't know I managed without it"

Swiss army hospital...'scalpel...'

Painting the Ceiling

Tool Box

"In the whole length and breadth of this world there is no more admirable a spot for a man and his dog to pass the time than the local Home Depot."

"Measure twice, cut once...and curse three times!"

"You've just got to have the biggest and the best, have'nt you?!"

'They look more up to date than the ones in your tool-box.'

Mechanic looking under the hood of a car.

"I sensed you needed my help. I’m Saint &@!#%&!!, the patron saint of cursing."

Name one serious woodworker who doesn't use state of the art kit. Thomas Chippendale.

Ralph spent his Sundays in the park gathering nuts.

Sale! Weed Whackers

'I suppose you want Polly to forget she heard that.'

"I got a swiss army hook!"

Hardware Store Tools Wrench

'Sure you won 'Contractor of the Decade' five times, McWit, but what have you done lately?'

Congratulations on your retirement!

'Where do I put the batteries?'

Waiting for retirement.

The Hammer

1 Only Smart Hammer Instructions

'Don't you have a better escape plan than that?'

'Swiss Army Rescue Service. How can we help?'

"Are you happy with your current ball?"

'The New... New, Swiss Army Knife.'

Gardener's Calendar: Try to put the other things back...

Three different categories of lawnmower.

"This is System One and I am holding the beta for System Two."

New Swiss Army Knife

'I feel like I'm in a rut, too!'

When Tia Carmen says... "A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner" it means "I can fix it with a hammer."

"You'll have to excuse my Stuart. He's just showing off his new drill.