Tongue-in-cheek Thinker Gifts

'On the plus side, you won't have to worry about me getting into an expensive college.'

No-Work Orange

Robinson decided to name him 'Casual Friday'.

Nobody mourned Sir Dad-Joke.

'Don't worry boss, it's probably archaic!'

'Economic indicators are down, but cheer up! The history revisionists will turn this into 'the good old days'...'

"It's not just me, Dad. Amazon.com has never made a cent, either."

'I'm fairly certain it's, what we call in the medical profession, a 'snake'.'

"I appreciate you asking for directions. But how reliable is 'Just follow your nose!' from a toucan?"

"Hail to thee, blithe spirit!"

Husband / Wife / On The Side

'Great now put the company logo on the togas and make the building in back look like the Parthenon.'

'We need someone on the outside.'

Tree funeral.

'This service has been brought back in house and outsourced numerous times, I propose that as the contract is up for renewal again we consider 'shaking it all about''

Having asked for some 'bruisers' to bruise oats for feeding horses, Mr. Haycock gets sent the 'Whitechaple Chicken' and the 'Bayswater Slasher'

"The president wants me to stay on as unemployed."

The Three Doctors.

"Seriously...girls have their own language!"

'May I recommend the ketchup '06,sir?'

"No Bald Games"

Burke and Hare and Hare

"I'm sorry you decided to leave us! I will really miss your wife at our company parties!"

"If you like the baby pictures you should see the 'Making Of' video!"

The Cheshire Dog.

'I feel really close to nature with the wood-burning stove.'

"Don’t you dare talk to your father in all caps young lady!"

"Come on and pay for the shopping like a man."

As you know by now know, we received dozens of replies to our request for suggestions to rename Rudy Park's generation. Today, we announce the third-place runners-up. That selection goes to a handful of readers who deemed Rudy's peer group Generation E for entitlement or entitled. Thoughts? I thought he E referred to easy to saddle with the deficit, you cheapskate curmudgeons! What do you think of that?! Solid retort. But we though enough to give it third place. Tomorrow: Our runners-up are anno

Kissing Booth

'The gentleman would like to buy you a drink if you'll follow him on twitter, and I'd be really grateful if you didn't explain what that means.'

R.I.P Seth Grimthorp

'Look, just because I work for you, doesn't mean that I like you sir.'

One-Stop Shopping. Illegal. Immoral. Fattening.

'Get with it, Ralph! Trophies are meaningless, when everyone gets one!'