Tidy Turtle Enthusiast Gifts

Tortoise polishing his shell

'Wow, these lights stay on the red cycle for a very long time.'

Turtle Trailer Court

'Your Honor, my client would like to wave his right to a speedy trial.'

Vinnie's Repossessions: A Turtle has just had his shell repossessed

"As you can see, our corporate structure is turtles all the way down."

"Well, if you didn't do anything in North Korea, then why do they keep launching missiles at us?"

'I thought I would rent it out for the extra dough.'

'Leo, did you forget to walk the snail?'

You'll see the food is excellent, but the service is far too slow....

The Stripper

Well, the doctor said you have to wear it until you stop biting your stitches.

Ike and Tina Turtle.

"All good Lucy, I've cleared the beach: you can safely go and lay your eggs now..."

"We haven't danced in ages."

'And I thought I had a big egg to lay.'

"The doc says I won't even make it another 45 years."

'He won't eat his lettuce until I've washed it five times. I'm sure his OCD is getting worse!'

'An this good luck charm is to commemorate when our turtle ran away. He's the one who took Jim's pinkie.'

Tortoises breakdancing

Honestly, I don't know why I even bring Harold to parties.

'That's one of those May-December love affairs. He's 251 years old, and she can't be a day over 135!'

A hard green shell on the outside doesn't always mean it's chocolaty on the inside.

'Sorry, he can't come out and play. He's grounded.'

"I've been really craving Italian food for months now. Can you grab me two kilos of rigatoni, three kilos of fettuccini, and a bigger shell? The one I have is feeling a bit too tight lately."

Here is our spot, I sink, Helga.

'Face it, we're vegetarians because plants can't toddle away.'

"And another thing, it's real cool in the summer!"

'I'm going to be a little late.'

"Hey, no kidding! I prefer slow dancing, too!"

'Look Mummy: I've put on my shell all by myself...'

Turtle Home

"A man threatens to destroy town with army of turtles after dispute with city hall. Local authorities initiate a shell-ter in place in preparation for the noc-turtle invasion."

"My doctor told me to get more exercise by walking a pet, but he didn't specify it had to be a dog."

Psychoanalyst turtle trying to help turtle patient come out of shell