Ticker Tape Tracker Gifts

You're just reading the stuff scrolling across the bottom...

Currently Boston

"That can't be right. How'd you work 15 hours in on day?"

Explorer with enormous magnifying glass.

"AXP 0.78, AIG 1.12, T 2.63. . ."

Lyme Disease Research Lab

"Honesty, I saw a train yesterday"

'Weird ... the footprints just seem to end right here.'

Loser's Podium.

'The sedative wears off in an hour. With the attached transmitter we can monitor his trading volume and patterns, commissions and mating rituals.'

"Tariff war"

Dog tallying his score against the mailman.

Prison Wallpaper.

"Here we go, blockbuster season..."

'There's something about that Indian scout I don't trust.'

'Dinosaur footprints!'

Smug Colleagues Leaving Work.

A bald man is chasing his toupee with a butterfly net

'It only seems like that because you got in on time.'

'We'll put our horses in 'Do Not Track' mode by going through this stream bed.'

Google stock IPO.

"It's boy meets girl, boy and girl do everything you've seen in every other movie."

'To tell you the truth I don't what it is.'

Daily Mail Reader

'Took me all night to write that message.'

News: Clown found in hot tub with pigs

Abrupt end to Red Feather's scouting career.

"Decaf. They can't be far away."

'He's staying up to change the sign as price hikes happen!'

"Our tracker says that he's located some deer sign."

"How the hell does he do that?"

'Bear tracks! I'd say, two days old.'