Thoughtful Parent Gifts

"Nature, nurture or a bit of both?"

"What did you learn in school today that I'd object to?"

'Do you mind if my son watches you cook? I'm trying to bring him up to be a vegetarian.'

"Sometimes ... I just want to run away."

"Someday she'll solve the world's problems."

Children in fancy dress on the way to music lessons

'Dad, what is peace?'

"But I brought you here so I wouldn't have to play with you."

Father nursing his sick child

'All cats have 4 legs and fur. I have 4 legs and fur...It's too hard to think anymore.'

"Mom, are you going to properly vet the baby before you bring her home from the hospital?"

Humpty Dumpty wearing over-the-shoulder seat belt smiles smugly.

At the Penguin fishing school: 'Gunvald has set the bar kind of high, gang!'

Sweet Jailbreak

"Look Daddy, at least the poor economy hasn't affected the Tooth Fairy yet!"

"Gosh, before you know it they'll be all grown up and making poor decisions that you can't comment on or ever make peace with!"

"We don't have a time-out chair in our Classroom Community, that's our mindfulness chair."

'Stressed out dogs relax through Yoga.'

'If you shoot your foot off don't coming running to me.'

"Mom, there's a monster under my bed. Can we keep it?"

"My mom says you can sleep on the top bunk if your parents will sign a release form."

'It appears that your son's problems stem from attention deficit disorder.'

"What part of this don't you understand?"

'That's not the image I wanted to leave him with.'

'Good morning, Dad, It's your turn to be the cowboys!'

"I bark, therefore I am."

". . . and this little piggy said 'to heck with it. Let's all go down to the Market Tavern!'"

"Delia, I’d like you to meet one of my oldest and dearest friends."

Now, my son, visualize yourself removing your diaper and sitting on the potty

I came for my daughter. She was hurt in gym? Your husband took her to the hospital. West Fester High School. Is my daughter, Twig Tree, here? Emergency. Your husband took her home. Isn't there anything I can do? Of course there is! Your insurance card, please. I am a good mother!

'Relax... breathe... visualize you inner dog treat...'

"It's just the virtue signal - unfortunately, it doesn't do much."

'I never played baseball, football or soccer. . . I grew up in the 'concussion era'.'

'I've got the children busy finding a solution to the Middle East crisis...'

"Where was I? I was either away from my desk or in a meeting."