Theory Of Relativity Gifts

'E=ma2. E=mb2...'

'I'm sending in my entry for the Best Relativity Theory Contest.'

'Penny for them, Albert.'

"If Einstein is correct, when we get back, my car will have been double parked for 320 years."

"The end is relative."

Math Dreams

Intelligent people laugh too!

Suzie would later win a Nobel Prize for her Law of Special Social Relativity.

Sigmund Freud.

Einstein develops his theories that time is relative while ordering at a fast food restaurant.

"What's your project for the science fair, Arnold?"

"Space is curved and time is relative? Yeah, OK...I'm calling you a cab right now, buddy."

'Guy comes up with one interesting theory about special relativity, suddenly he thinks he's freakin' Einstein,'

'They're dog roses!'

"Notice how Dad ages faster at relativistic speeds?"

'Einstein's blackboard as he left it'

'What do you mean 'theoretically'? Everything we do is theoretical.'

'Quantum Mechanics is one of the three great pillars supporting our understanding of the natural world.

Lecture on Chaos Theory delayed because the speaker dropped his notes.

Physicists disputing whether the clock moves backwards or forwards according to season change.

'So much for Newton. Now, as for Einstein...'

"Do you ever wish you lived in a different era, Randy?" "Well… every waking moment I wish I were living before the beginning of existence itself. So I could witness the Big Bang." "It's safer to keep me where I am. Injecting my advanced virility into more primitive eras could have disastrous effects on the timeline." "That way I could know for sure whether our universe is all just one big simulation running on some geek's computer." "I mean, everything being made up of atoms and math is

Have you heard that time is not a constant, Randy? Of course, little buddy It's called "time dilation." Time moves slower for objects in motion than it does for objects that sit still. I'm a prime example. I haven't aged a day in decades. I still have rippling muscles, a smooth pelt, glistening teeth, twinkling eyes, a raging libido, and the boundless confidence of youth ... all because I'm always on the move. I'm writing a study on it for the Journal of Temporal Hotness. I've been meaning to as

I've got a new theory, Randy, and it's going to shock the world. Why? Because it's pretty much irrefutable. You know how when you're in the bathroom, it feels like five minutes have passed … but to those waiting to use it, it feels like forever? Yes … And you know how when you're at the event horizon of a black hole, five minutes to you actually is forever to the rest of the universe? ... I think we'd better alert Neil Degrasse Tyson. I call it the Time Toilation Theory.

''Time is an illusion'? - How long did it take you to come up with that?'

"What's the first thing you remember?" "Why do you ask?" "Because it'll help the cosmologists." "Come again?" "Cosmologists have discovered a lot about the universe. In 1990, they discovered cosmic microwaves are 'black body radiation.'" "What that means is, they discovered the microwave radiation that fills the universe conforms exactly to a pattern known as a 'black body spectrum' that was predicted by models of the Big Bang." "English!!!" "They proved the Big Bang happened." "But one of the b

The Quantum Mechanic...

Stephen Hawking

'The great thing about string theory is that it ties up quite a few loose ends.'

Einstein

The Development of the Theory of Relativity

'The beauty of this is that it is only of theoretical importance, and there is no way it can be of any practical use whatsoever.'

Stephen Hawking: Pale Blue Dot

Freudian vs Behavior therapist.

'I find that coming in late and leaving early makes the day go by faster.'