Theatrical Foodie Gifts

Dramatic readings of food labels.

'Personally I take all these programmes with a pinch of salt.'

"I just finished your manuscript and I found the ending delicious."

"I'll have the drum an sea bass, the house salad and the techno nachos!"

'Hard to follow...'

"Bill just does celebrity cook-books these days, that's where the real money is."

Never write a sonnet on an empty stomach

'Would that be rare, or medium rare?'

Empty landscape containing food and stationery.

"I'd like a fat-free, gluten-free, MSG-free, mini, super-skinny, artisan latte please..."

Complex Carbohydrates

'Romano, Romano, wherefore art thou Romano?'

"I'm a vegan. I don't know what made me order a cheeseburger. Maybe I've got the flesh eating disease."

Salad Hat

'I'm not very hungry after eating my first quarter losses.'

'This next number is a love song, all about my dinner.'

Difference between regular and French onion soup? "When I serve the French onion soup, I sneer."

Violinist plays stringy cheese

"I'm supposed to sing you the specials. Do you want me to do that?"

Turkey under mistletoe with sign that says: 'Kiss your ass goodbye'.

"I used to come here to browse. Now I graze."

Happy St Pancakes Day!

Flight Crew Holiday Treats

"Remember... the cork. You're supposed to smell the cork!"

Salad Bowl Drum

'I don't want a free coffee, I want that chef out of the country!'

"I thought it was time to throw out the pizza boxes. What's amazing is it's just from the weekend."

'Waiter - This salad isn't appropriately dressed!'

"All the world’s a stage, and we merely the actors/waiters."

Mandolin Players At Dinner

"Places, everybody!"

Potato singing - 'Peelings,, Nothing more than Peelings,,'

Woman dressed as a soup can

'Every crowd has a silver lining!'