Teleconference Titans Gifts

'Whose idea was it to teleconference our staff meetings?'

Annual run-off at the mouth.

"Who called this meeting again?"

'Could we finish these negotiations via e-mail? That will allow me to think before I respond to your proposals.'

'Hey dude, just got the SMS of the Wild...'

'From here I can monitor world stocks, or attend overseas teleconferences, unfortunately I can't get out though because the door's stuck.'

Pie chart of pub conversations

Thank you for not making faces during teleconferences with the boss.

"Hey Dolly, get back here!"

"Marie, forward all my calls – I’m working on an ulcer from home today."

'Does it come on Disc?'

'Welcome to the rat race.'

Telework Pants

"After endless delays, boarding confusion and lost luggage, it appears he's finally arriving at his conclusion."

"Could you continue to work from home? We're enjoying not having you in the office."

Plato seeking platonic love on Tinder

"I work from home. Well, technically my parents' home. I live in their basement."

"A meeting? You bet I would!"

Text in a bottle

"Sorry, but working remote is not a constitutional right."

Rudy, I summon thee. You are chosen to carry it forth. The Tablet. Behold: the upgraded iPad Pro. Better than a computer with the thinnest design ever. And I am the chosen one to tell the masses? Sort of. We expect millions to purchase and carry the message, making this a must-own item for 2019. But, yes, I mean, totally, you're chosen. A worthy daydream tends to have some elements of reality. Quickly, give us your credit card.

"Hello, this is Bill Gates. Remember, nobody has a monopoly on safety, so buckle up!"

'My bank has introduced a new 'SMS alert' service.'

'These teleconferences have become a lot more civil since I installed this 7 second delay.'

"You know you can't see her."

I'm comfort breaking my ass off here!

"You need some low-impact exercise. I suggest deleting all the spam I get as it comes in for the next month."

'Hey Greg, you gonna be at work today?' - 'No, man. Workin' from home. You?'

'Excuse me, would you like some tips on video marketing?'

'I don't think you've officially entered the computer age until you actually click send.'

"Sending a text wishing me happy anniversary is not very romantic! . . . Especially on my birthday!"

Despair.

"The fine print? Privacy Policy and Terms of Use."

"Judging tech giants is a bit beyond my pay grade."

"Pretending to be frozen to avoid difficult questions only works on Zoom, Kyle."