Teleconference Wizards Gifts

"Hey Dolly, get back here!"

Aladdin conjures up a virtual genie.

"So who is this First pet?"

'In today's market hyperbole was up sharply. Similes and metaphors held relatively steady with euphemisms hitting another record low.'

Remember, honey, abracadabra doesn't work anymore. Now it's command, option, shift.

'So you still can't get a sound engineer then?'

'This is Martins, the office I was telling you about. She's got a real knack for texting people down from window ledges!'

Sports Radio in Crisis

This reader asks, "Dear Dr. Ernie, is it true that most people need to improve their listening skills?" Sure, I enjoy the glistening hills.

"Our system's been cracked. How is that even possible?"

'From here I can monitor world stocks, or attend overseas teleconferences, unfortunately I can't get out though because the door's stuck.'

He'll be fine after you reboot him, I've replaced his memory stick.

Thank you for not making faces during teleconferences with the boss.

"Miss. Wilcox, get me the coast."

Telecommuting doesn't hold up well during team building trust exercises.

"As a last resort Tom's trying a mind-meld!"

STRIP Hambone: Computer language

'Try re-installing your system software and turn off any file extensions.'

The Town Tweeter

"And she's an interesting conversationalist, too."

Telework Pants

"My therapist says you have to at least meet me half way."

'I wonder if TED ever listens.'

'Whose idea was it to teleconference our staff meetings?'

"Whose idea was it to create a Zoom session for first graders?"

"Ladies and Gentlemen! For my next trick, I will attempt to correctly remember my password..."

"Honey, the toaster is down, but it's already alerted the oven to pre-heat and broil your muffins."

"Could you continue to work from home? We're enjoying not having you in the office."

'All our operators are busy with customers who don't have an eternity to wait.'

Scan And Repair

Texting Addicts Anonymous

"When they said they wanted staff to work from home, I didn't think they meant our home."

'This is my multi application cell phone, it does all my work. I just hit OK button!'

Scottish Dialect

Boo-gle.