Teenage Pregnancy Gifts

I wanted to be a barrister or solicitor but now I want to be a burden on society

"I feel sorry for kids these days - they're always being tested for something"

"Is this birds and bees chat going to take long, I'm late for my pre natal class."

"Mum, Dad - I've got a shock for you: I'm pregnant."

"If you have to ask if they come with batteries, then you're too young to have a baby."

'School Outfitters, now with maternity section'

"Eeny, meeny, miney, mo.."

I must pay attention in sex education class...

'Thank God! We thought you were obese.'

'I'm pregnant.'

Pregnant Cheerleaders,

Child Support: 'Under name of father you've put Dunno Somebloke - is that an ethnic name?'

"I'd love to be a stay at home mum, but I'll get into so much trouble if I miss any more school."

'Teenagers!'

"Really? They're now giving out non-participation trophies?"

"Well, young man... just consider yourself grounded!"

My Dad, trying to look young. The cap hides his bald spot and the sweatshirt hides his gut!

"Well, I had 'the talk' with him.

"Yeah, I got into trouble, but I think the principal really enjoyed my rendition of 'I Did It My Way.'"

'Well, Tommy, you've grown a foot since the last time I saw you!'

'I'd explain how the TV, VCR, DVD, surround sound home entertainment system works...but I don't know.'

Mayhem, Inc. Part 21

Grand. Baby Grand. Toddler Grand. Teen Grand.

"He's gone goth"

"We’ve nailed guitar-solo-face. Time to try playing instruments."

"Check it out! In nature, females are in charge...they select their mates!"

It's a radical new development, a text novel for the text generation

'The school computers are six months old. How can I be expected to be competitive in the job market if I'm trained on obsolete equipment?'

'Good night, Dear. Text me if you need anything.'

“Dad, I think I’ve finally found Gsus.”

"Maybe if I make myself inconspicuous I won't be called on."

"I'll get up in negative five minutes."

Wow. Totaled. Teen Test Dummy.

"It's called, 'Goth'."

The Life and Times of Miley Cyrus