Teen Child Gifts

"A major crime publisher is interested in publishing your homework!"

'Uranus!'

That's when I decided why should I care

"Assuming your parents check your browsing history, let's mess with them a little. . . H-A-R-V-A-R-D T-U-I-T-I-O-N."

"I'm bored. I think I'll post something online that destroys my career prospects."

Spring Break.

"Yes, we're supposed to sing, but not Rap!"

"You'd better put that phone down before you walk into a wall."

Teenage Yoda

"Son, we're concerned about your partying."

"Yeah, I got into trouble, but I think the principal really enjoyed my rendition of 'I Did It My Way.'"

"Well, young man... just consider yourself grounded!"

"Well, I had 'the talk' with him.

My Dad, trying to look young. The cap hides his bald spot and the sweatshirt hides his gut!

'Well, Tommy, you've grown a foot since the last time I saw you!'

A Punk Rocker Cocoon.

"Really? They're now giving out non-participation trophies?"

Wordplay: Hibernation.

'I'd explain how the TV, VCR, DVD, surround sound home entertainment system works...but I don't know.'

"Check it out! In nature, females are in charge...they select their mates!"

"He's gone goth"

It's a radical new development, a text novel for the text generation

"We’ve nailed guitar-solo-face. Time to try playing instruments."

'The school computers are six months old. How can I be expected to be competitive in the job market if I'm trained on obsolete equipment?'

'Good night, Dear. Text me if you need anything.'

"It's called, 'Goth'."

"I'll get up in negative five minutes."

“Dad, I think I’ve finally found Gsus.”

"Maybe if I make myself inconspicuous I won't be called on."

'This is a good time to be young, son. Look at all the opportunities you have in front of you...you can help sole the problems of the environment, poverty,civil rights....'

'I think there was a typo in the lab instructions.'

"I hate you! You don't understand me and you don't understand my software!"

'You can stick your filthy shell. I'm listening to the Arctic Monkeys.'

'Since we're being so honest, perhaps I should mention that I liked you better as an egg.'

"I've tracked our GPS coordinates over the past week dad. Well, we're roaming the plains alright!"