Teen Gifts

"The trouble with you, son, is that you won't take any responsibility for your actions..." "And whose fault is that?"

Two-Facedbook.

'Dad, when do I stop being a wholly owned susidiary of you and Mom?'

'This is a good time to be young, son. Look at all the opportunities you have in front of you...you can help sole the problems of the environment, poverty,civil rights....'

'Is this one of those times that I'm supposed to hold your hand or disappear?'

'What does the word ‘Face' mean in this sentence: 'He was only trying to save face.' A) The front of the head. B)To look at something. C) The surface of a solid. D) Dignity.

The Addict

"Hey, look - Mom left us an internal memo."

"Homework! I haven't got time to do homework."

'Haven't you bought homework off internet yet?'

"Why don't you get off the computer and watch some TV?"

"I think a pat on the back would have been enough for him tidying his room!"

'When I was young and got mad at my parents, I would scribble on the walls. Now, I infect their computers with a virus.'

'Sure the grades are bad, but on the bright side I'm achieving consistency in my academic brand.'

'I assume this is a fictionalized version of your algebra homework.'

'I went through the data and found an 11.7% increase in the discretionary spending portion of our family budget, so I see no reason not to raise my allowance.'

"Wow, this new version is a way more immersive waste of our youth."

Parent about kid reading 'Improving Your Video Gaming': 'It's the only way I could get him to read.'

'I got a performance indicator of either establishing, developing or emerging!'

Hooray! The youth is interested in politics and in the environment!!

"I think I upset her by using a full stop in my text."

The tulip knew it was in trouble when called by its scientific name.

"What am I supposed to rinse my mouth out with so my parents won't know?"

'You wanted wireless video gaming? You got it. Now, go outside and play.'

'Dad, can I borrow the club tonight?'

"Your dad sure worries a lot."

"It's actually a maximalist art installation."

'You're no son of mine!'

Disturbed Youth Orchestra - Rehearsals

How to dress for forty below...if you're over forty, or under twenty.

'When I said children should be seen and not heard, I wasn't giving you permission to get tattoos.'

Just Be.

'I think there was a typo in the lab instructions.'

"Wow!...Hold it up, and the app tells you what that is."

"My parents hate it."