Teen Fiction Fan Gifts

'What's wrong, Brenda? I thought you were into this whole 'Twilight' fad.'

Meet Stephen Krkzk Author of 'Why Conspiracy Theories Are Nonsense'

"Couldn't you have just laughed instead of spelling 'LOL' in your alphabet soup?"

'We're gonna need a bigger moat...!'

Wordplay: Hibernation.

J. R. R. Tolkien

"NOW can I shoot you out of a cannon?"

Igor hesitated - "You give me that silly old brain, and i'll give you these magic beans!"

'Henrietta is so self-confident.'

'Which wine goes best with 'the old man and the sea'?'

"We could have been here sooner, but we wanted to wait until the beautiful Yellow Brick Road was built."

'I've no time for these foragers - they come into the area and snap up all the best houses...'

Fourth Tableau of Das Rheingold

"Is this fiction, non-fiction or historical fiction?"

Book Shop Plot Spoilers

Hansel and Gretal

'I need a sun cream with a very high protection factor.'

"Regarding the plot of your novel ... what on earth were you thinking?"

A man with Dwarfism is reading Little Women.

"Mark, you have to stop calling John's gospel 'Fan Fiction.'"

Mermaids in love

Frankenstein's Ancestry

Going Down?

"It all happened so fast. 'Notable Book of the Year' to the remainder shelves to HERE in just six months!"

"Yes, could you discuss the inspiration for the protagonist? Specifically, the motivations which propel the direction of his narrative?" "I would prefer not to." "Bartleby, the author."

"First I alienated the apes who'd raised me. Then there was a lot of turmoil with the colonials pulling out. Now Jane and me are semi-retired and I haven't swing through the trees in ages. Want a drink?"

'Well this is awkward.'

"I wish you would actually sell one of these novels...all these returned manuscripts are giving me backaches!"

"It's a bit of a surprise. He has eaten people before, but only when he felt threatened. Your husband must have provoked him."

Hi again

Pied Piper uses 'Rat Nav'.

Humpty Dumpty wearing over-the-shoulder seat belt smiles smugly.

A child watches as a small figure parachutes out of a tiny aeroplane that has collided with his mobile.

The Mad Hatter finally gets taken down.

"When you have a moment would you mind browning the meringue?"