Tech-savvy Traditionalist Gifts

'Online baking is convenient but what I miss most is walking over to the bank and chatting with the tellers.'

"They're prototypes. Eventually they'll be touchscreen."

"It's from my Telemedicine Man!"

'Now the Pope's on Twitter, do you think he'll open a Papal account?'

"Mommy, look! Tablets from olden days!"

'Couldn't you just text these to me?'

'We now accept chip & pin.'

Christmas stockings hanging from fireplace. Sign above reads 'Now Accepting Paypal'.

General Store Modernises

"You know this isn't environmentally friendly! Maybe we should just email instead!"

Note on computer for milkman.

"Call me old fashioned, but I can't get all enthusiastic about organizing a war party since Sitting-Bull switched to Zoom meetings."

"You may now kiss the bride..."

"...and I'm saying we would've been here a lot quicker if we had used the SatNav rather than follow that stupid star."

"You can go to my website for the full list of what I want."

"Shall we all relocate to the living room for the Queens Tweet?"

He's calling Running Bear on his mobile.

'It's my favorite Christmas gift - a wireless computer mouse that looks just like my old fountain pen!'

'You can send your list to my ho-ho-hotmail account.'

Hold on - Is that your phone yodeling or mine?

"Christmas pudcast"

"I'll call you back. I'm harvesting rice."

Man Reading Laptop.

The Uber Ride of Paul Revere

"I broncobust and I Dust-Bust. You got a problem with that?"

'You know, I never have had a sabbatical....'

God's Phone

"I'm going on a retreat."

'Pink isn't EITHER the new black!'

"If we could all turn to page 387, turn off your iPods and repeat after me?"

S�ance "I'm through to your husbands voice-mail"

"So no bases are uncovered, Sister Ann gives the sermon to the deaf and Brother Brooks blogs it."

Champagne at the hunt

'No, Father, they're not praying. They're texting.'

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