Taxpaying Comrade Gifts

"It won't hurt a bit. Dr. Taxmore is doing a routine walletectomy."

Contrary to popular belief, the road to Hell is paved with a comprehensive, lifetime tax return.

'As the government sees it, the U.S. budget would be fine if more deficit earners like you, Mr. Wald, go on the ball!'

'My class is so large and my seat so far back, I feel like I'm taking a distance-learning course.'

'We've gone to profit-sharing. But it's with the IRS.'

'Oh great, now I have to render unto Caesar, too.'

You want an extension? Good heavens, man, we haven't even paid for Reagans boondoggles yet!

"Look at that – they’re retreating!"

"There's no business deductions like show business deductions."

'You realize, of course, Death is the ultimate tax shelter?'

"Our accountant is great. We were a C corp, but now we're a B- corp."

Budget reaction.

Romney: 'Corporations are people! We just pay a lot less taxes than you!'

'We learned today that the world is a huge ball, which revolves on it's taxes.'

'You Americans call it 'Illegal Tax Evasion'? Well, here in Europe, we call it 'Monaco Effect Investments''!

Stimulus bust

'Ah, I see you made £2,000 more for me this year.'

"I now represent both death and taxes."

'I was all ready to deal with the military, but I never expected an IRS coup!'

'If the meek inherit the earth, imagine the capital gains tax.'

'Maybe we can't fool all the people all the time, but we sure can tax all the people all the time.'

PAYMASTER, 'Just to be on the safe side, we withheld EVERYTHING this week.'

'Some see the glass as half empty, some see it as half full -- I see it as taxable!'

irs, 'You were wrong -- they WEREN'T more afraid of me than I was of them.'

Inside Jim Flaherty's office.

'This rebate check isn't big enough for both of us.'

'Don't you hate undergoing peer review in these high school chemistry labs?'

'About this obscene material found in your desk.'

"It's not fair that we have to pay taxes on something we don't have - last year's income."

'I feel sure I'm paying too little tax, who do I see about it?'

'I'm being audited! Quick, everyone into the tax shelter!'

"Since time is an issue, I didn't have time to organize my receipts."

'Thank God I don't live in a Jimmy Choo!'