Tax Paperwork Wizard Gifts

Updated Fairy Tales. Having all of them around sure sweetened my stimulus check!

"I'm curious about your dependent children, Scamp, Flop, and Spunky."

"Tax evasion is like a cancer, it's growing exponentially!"

'Check with legal and find out -- maybe we're a non-profit.'

"Seriously, do you expect us to believe you put on 143 feet a day in business travel?"

IRS Audits. Do you have tax records? No, I pay about the same as most people.

"This pesky decimal point seems to give you quite a bit of trouble."

The president of a company see a sign: While you were out we hit the lottery!

"Says, property of the I.R.S."

Fortune cookies based on various business magazines.

'Don't worry! Since 28% of my salary goes to the government, I've decided to work 72% of the time!'

In trays read: Bluff/Blink.

"I still have my loophole, but I can't drive a truck through it."

'You think he overheard my last lecture on tax code revision?'

Tax Collector

"Taxation, meet Representation."

I've managed to get your tax bill down to zero, this year ... however, my bill is $10 million.

'I'd like the short form instead...'

You may go free, to worry about tax and the economy like the rest of us.

"I see you've arranged your life and business so that you can deduct everything. Do you know the penalty for 'trying to beat the system'?"

"Hi, I'm Bob Darrel. I'm here to perform the audit of your books. Don't mind the vultures. They follow me everywhere."

'I'm here about the tax credits for business equipment which you listed in your return as 'Betty', 'Mabel', 'Liz'...'

"He can afford a bigger cage. His old tax forms line the bottom."

'I've begun spreading my wealth to offshore accounts.'

'I'm very sorry, sir. Even for stressed out bankers, whiskey and gin aren't tax-deductible expenses.'

The Meaning of Life/Tax Avoidance Advice.

Tax Department - Whammy/double whammy

'I'm your fantasy from the U.S. Treasury Department.'

Monster under the bed.

"Your tax return reads like one of your novels."

It's 10pm do you know where your 401-k is?'

The Accountant Husband

'First, I want you to get your dependents off my desk.'

'I feel sure I'm paying too little tax, who do I see about it?'

"These here accountants should be ready just in time for tax season."