Tapestry Trekker Gifts

"I got the box set to binge later."

'Of all the nerve!...Making us sit through the whole of their Bayeux Tapestries!!'

"I feel off. I want to feel off and running."

Nature Lovers

School trip little porters.

'We can probably make Mars in one day.'

'How come they know where we are when we don't.'

"Does the No. 1 stop here and does that go to Penn Station and can I get a train there to Philadelphia and then how do I get to Walnut Street?"

'Are you guys still watching the tapestry? Why don't you go outside it's such a nice day!'

"You're doing great - keep it up."

Man with twisted legs using a twisted walking stick.

"It's one mile as the crow flies, ten miles as the lost hiker bushwhacks."

Gym: Back and Forth or Going Nowhere.

"Well, it certainly explains why everyone's so nice!"

'I need to lose enough pounds to take a thirty-five meal cruise!'

"Hey. . . in use!"

"Why did you just dump my kiwi-colada smoothie on my head?" "I'm glad you (huff) asked." "Studies (huff) show that sitting all (huff) day long behind a desk leads (huff) to obesity, sickness, (huff) toe-swelling (huff) and an early, (huff) excruciating (huff) death." "So more (huff) and more (huff) office workers are using (huff) standing desks (huff) with treadmills." "Have you ever (huff) tried handing someone (huff) a smoothie while running (huff) on a treadmill?" "They walk. ...walk."

'And you all thought I didn't have a hobby.'

"The gods really love tight buns."

Cat Knitting a Tapestry

"I just love these genuine old tapestries on the walls, with their medieval calm. Oh, my—is that a Roycroft lamp?!"

"Bayeux Tapestry warning: Containes scenes some may finde disturbing."

"Courtney: Raised by hamsters"

Speed enforced by really slow walkers.

The festive season brings it's own interesting little chores...and well earned rewards.

'I got the idea from the parks department.'

'Says here that if you meet a bear in the woods, never try to outrun it!'

A woman rides a treadmill as she chases a cookie jar on a refridgerator.

Bayeux Tapestry

'Oh, great! We've been going round in right-angled triangle.'

"Honey ... let’s never ... ever ... do this ... again."

'About this trip to the Amazon jungle...I want my money back!'

Not in. Take 1 aspirin and call in morning.

"I thought this was a little heavier than usual."

Champagne area.