Tapestry Time Traveler Gifts

"I got the box set to binge later."

"Let's just say I have a pre-existing condition."

"Meet the scribe"

Historical memory is on life support.

Moses on the web

'That's about it so far, Son.'

If time travel was invented in 1600 in England. I'm a fan of the bard. Let's see if he wants to take a journey through time. Globe Theater. Sounds fun! Let's go to 2020. It's a nice round number. Zazzz! Poof! That's weird. How did they know he was coming? And why does he need to leave this place? Apparently you can't be here, William. The sign says "No Shakespeare in the park this summer."

"We're following Carrot Top."

The Missing Sock Returns

"So then, after I'd invented my time machine, I thought: why not go back and visit the good old days?"

"The weatherman said dress for the mid 70's. Bob was elated." "Much. Too. Sexy."

'Of all the nerve!...Making us sit through the whole of their Bayeux Tapestries!!'

Second hand furniture.

E=mc2.

Pinocchio's Second Realization

'I'd say it's six of one and one half doxen of the other.'

"While you were working on fire, I was working on my satellite. Once we figure out how to launch it into the heavens, other inventions will follow, like phones, GPS, weather predictions. . ."

"Early model of baggage claim"

Einstein develops his theories that time is relative while ordering at a fast food restaurant.

"Damn. I took the Rip Van Nyquil."

"Please! No harmonizing during ululations!"

"Wait... what was it I came up here for?"

Sundial Time

Time for vacation, time for work.

"About how if the dark ages never happened we'd be so much more technologically advanced by now."

"I'm going to prove that Math comes in handy later in life."

Danger Slow Sand.

'You know what they say - 'Those who don't learn the lessons of history are doomed to go to summer school.''

"More quarters! For God's sake, more quarters!!"

"We have plenty of time to catch the ark."

"This just in... the country has adopted a 24 hr military clock... ...details at 23."

'When I met him he was all bright and shiny - now he's a rust bucket.'

'This new game isn't working out -- the ball keeps running away.'

"I don't know who you are!"

"It seems like only yesterday that Dad told me I'll be an adult before I know it."