Tanning Salon Regular Gifts

"Oh, don't mind him. He comes here to get warmed over."

Bad fake tan day.

Wood Stain and Sun Tan Lotion

"Can you make me look like Wolverine?"

Sunbathing in Autumn

'With all the tanning lotion, sun block and moisturizers, we're more coated with batter than the onion rings!'

I know you're bored but you better not be doing that rain dance again!

-...And we don't discriminate against people of colour. -I've been on the sunbed!

IT staffer vacation tan lines.

"Be careful of that sun, Stewart. You're starting to look like the front page of the 'Times Book Review.'"

'Trucker's tan?'

'I washed the gray right out of my hair, but now I can't get the gray out of my tub.'

"It's a belly button thermometer. When it pops up, I'm done!"

A gap between the solar panels

'I love us when we're tan.'

Sun Screen Denial - I Don't burn...

How to spot a tourist on the beach.

Sun Worshipers

'Looks like they were sun worshippers.'

'You're new here, aren't you?'

"I didn't know you liked ranch so much."

"Let's change things up a bit. Give me the crinkle cut."

Darling, you should have asked me to put sun tan lotion on your back and not the kids!

'The sun lounge book of melanomas.'

The Sun Bather

'Medium well, please.'

Beauty Bee

"Rare, medium or well done?"

"Well sir. . . you could have a crew cut, flat top, a stiff quiff, a hi-top fade. . . "

Tree's Tree Nursery. I'm off work. Let's catch some rays! You already have a great tan from your job! You don't need to go sunbathing. Oh, yes I do!

One isn't snubbing One's wedding, One is merely celebrating One's wedding by topping up One's tan.

'No wonder you're more tanned than I am - you are nearer the sun!'

'Do you want it set for light, medium or butterball?'

Gym/Tan/Donut

"I smell bacon. Are you wearing sunscreen?"