Swimwear Enthusiast Gifts

Human 'A': Tried on 500 swimsuits for 'bonus curves'. . .

'Have you got anything a little less invasive?'

I saw you at the beach yesterday in your new bikini!

'What do you think of my bathing suit?'

Excess Baggage: Don't let the sight of a 20-something in the same swim suit as yours ruin your vacation.

Penguin in a swimming costume.

"All I do is swim and eat plankton, but do I lose weight?"

'We can't go in... we've only one 'pair of trunks' between us!'

"Oh boy, that was a huge belly-flop..."

"Gilbert! Here's Mamma!"

A man runs on the water from a shark.

"It's not that you're too old for a thong, dear. It's just you've got it on backwards."

'Dad, can you teach me to swim?' 'Well, I'm not much of a swimmer, but I can teach you to tread water. I do that every day at work.'

"The peasants have lost all respect for the moat."

Mankini - One size fits all.

Lapdogs

Two piece outfits only.

'Yeh it's just that I haven't been able to swim on my front,since my boob job.'

'Now that's a sexy looking bathing suit!'

'Honestly, Clara, that bikini leaves little to the imagination And how long are you going to stand there, holding your stomachs in'

'Yessir! That's what I want to see around our company - innovation and the bravery to do things different!'

'The swimmers line up for this, the final heat, and surprise, surprise, It's the dog paddle.'

Thong World.

'She certainly gets a lot out of her bikini.'

No petting in the pool!

Bathing suit.

'Yes, this is the deep end.'

A couple of polar bears enjoy their new swimming pool - a refurbished igloo . . .

Rip Taylor Tide

Sasquatch/Summersquatch

"How come more men seem to get into difficulty when we're on life guard duty?"

MMM-MM, Cellulite

It's called, 'Paint a Picture, Buster, It'll Last Longer!'

Bill Shankland

'Is this the way to the beach?'