Swimming Coach Gifts

Psychic diving competition.

'Please calm down, Mam. I'm aware of the situation, and I'm doing everything I possibly can.'

'You'll never be the next Micheal Phelps if you don't start working on your breaststroke.'

'You go on without me. I wait half an hour after eating, before I go swimming.'

Diver bouncing so high he flies out of the pool.

'You're disqualified.'

"Let the shark out."

'They're not a swimming aid - they're my feet !'

Carpool lane (a car driving into a long pool).

100 metres butterfly.

Last Place in Swimming Contest

'The swimmers line up for this, the final heat, and surprise, surprise, It's the dog paddle.'

The pre-frenzy huddle.

"Ok. . . who added the yellow?"

'Now, at the signal from our new head coach...'

The synchronized shower event.

'Listen Jimmy, as a member of the School Swimming Squad, you're not taking your training seriously enough!'

Butterfly catching.

Dolphin wins the swimming competition.

Never swim on a full stomach...

Mermaid in swimming race.

Weighted Water Polo

"I hear our new aquatics director is really good!"

Swim meet - sharks vs. humans

'Which end's the shallow end?'

"Witnesses say he was texting."

"I have to quit the swim team. My braces rusted."

A Swimmer Doing Breastroke

A man stands on a swimmer to film him.

The Synchronized-Swim Team Quits

Performance Enhancers

'Is the water cold?'

'... Get set... Wait! We forgot the water!'

'Swimming is the healthiest sport. . . Because it's the only one where you can't smoke while you're doing it.'

Fishy tail.