Survivalist Sage Gifts

Look on the bright side, at least we're keeping our heads above water

"I derive some satisfaction from being right."

"Well, at least he was tasty."

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

'Don't think of it as being a yes man, think of it as being an employed man.'

Desert Island Meals.

"I dunno, looks like a trap."

A desert island with a knotted palm tree

Problem Solving: Man rows desert island to land.

"More rescue efforts, less screenplay."

"You seem troubled, Pastor. Is anything worrying you...I mean aside from the sins of the world, the vanity of humankind, man's inhumanity to man..."

"Day 4,261... I don’t know how much longer I can survive. Still no signs of civilization. Food is scarce and I fear the wound on my ankle is infected. Still, all this pales in comparison to the horror of having to be anywhere at any particular time."

65 Million Years Ago

'Arf! Arf!'

'He refuses to leave without the tree and their son.'

"Yes, I'm alone."

"Day 736. Still loving the fact that I can smoke all over this island..."

'Oh, yeah? -- Well, my true inner self can whip your true inner self!'

'I was thinking-what if the tide's OUT?'

'I'm glad to see you've started building a boat.'

"Yes, I'm sure of my 3 wishes - I wish I had a pen, I wish I had paper to write a 'rescue me' note, and I wish I had a bottle to send it in"

"Yes, we're stranded here... but think how healthier we are eating nothing but fish!"

"Pastor, may we share a message with you about humility?"

'I hate evolution!'

'Do you mean 'who cares what the meaning of life is,' or that 'who cares' IS the meaning of life?'

Bob liked a challenge, and the shipwreck gave him something to get his teeth into.

'Remember, son, don't believe any thing you hear and only half of what you see.'

Prepper Dog

The trap

"Day 19,918: Once again, Gary cannot believe he's still alive."

"Why can't we just have a normal home security system like the neighbours."

Female chemotherapy warrior.

'Do you have to be so melodramatic?'

Doug reasoned that things could be worse...but just how much worse...he wasn't sure??