Survivalist Sensei Gifts

'It would be a kindness to tell he HAS won his Duke of Edinburgh Award.'

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

'Don't think of it as being a yes man, think of it as being an employed man.'

Desert Island Meals.

"I dunno, looks like a trap."

A desert island with a knotted palm tree

Problem Solving: Man rows desert island to land.

65 Million Years Ago

"More rescue efforts, less screenplay."

"Day 4,261... I don’t know how much longer I can survive. Still no signs of civilization. Food is scarce and I fear the wound on my ankle is infected. Still, all this pales in comparison to the horror of having to be anywhere at any particular time."

'Arf! Arf!'

"Day 736. Still loving the fact that I can smoke all over this island..."

"Wa-wa. . . wa-wa. . . wa-wa. . ."

"Always carry a ball with you! If you are chased by a dog, stop, show the ball and throw it. Believe me, he won't be able to resist chasing it instead of you..."

'He refuses to leave without the tree and their son.'

"Yes, I'm alone."

'Yeah, but if it's NOT a mirage, maybe we can find Mapquest on it!'

'I'm glad to see you've started building a boat.'

'I was thinking-what if the tide's OUT?'

"Yes, I'm sure of my 3 wishes - I wish I had a pen, I wish I had paper to write a 'rescue me' note, and I wish I had a bottle to send it in"

'I hate evolution!'

Bob liked a challenge, and the shipwreck gave him something to get his teeth into.

'Remember, son, don't believe any thing you hear and only half of what you see.'

Prepper Dog

"We've got a problem."

The trap

"Why can't we just have a normal home security system like the neighbours."

Desert island dweller sinks in sand.

Man on desert island using elastic to shoot him off the island.

'Do you have to be so melodramatic?'

Doug reasoned that things could be worse...but just how much worse...he wasn't sure??

A castaway on an island with an old TV that's washed ashore, sees two men in an approaching boat marked, 'TV Licensing'.

Unlike modern day hipsters, pre-historic hipsters didn't need to rely on yoga, hiking or even rock climbing to stay fit...

Island and man