Survivalist Of The Workplace Jungle Gifts

'Mondays are really Hell here!'

'Sorry, suffering from burnout return in a week.'

'I clawed my way to the top and then I clawed my way back to the middle.'

"I'd like a week off without any business related e-mail on my home computer."

'Wake me up when he doesn't use a buzzword.'

"Good morning. Fen, Boscage, Bracken & Spinney."

"I feel your pain."

Emergency Phone.

Late/Too Late.

'Your main goal in this job is getting out alive.'

A man is in an office, behind him is a glass box containing a glass and a bottle, there is a sign saying 'in case of emergency'

"You knew this was a soul-sucking job when you took it."

"We should have taken the cubicles."

"Wow - you say you're a workaholic, but your office says it's time for your vacation!"

"You're doing great, only thirty-one more years to go."

"Everyone seek higher ground! The paperwork is rising to a dangerous level."

'You can't fire me! -- This is a right-to-work state!'

'Ever feel like you've walked into a corporate lion's den?'

"I may be incompetent. But, if you fire me there'll be no one who knows less about this company than you."

Cafe Burns.

Office Weather

Get Well Soon and Hurry Back to the Office. . . Before Sharks Eat Your Job

Getting through the week.

Twisted Peel works overtime.

"When everyone's an 800 pound gorilla, nobody's an 800 pound gorilla.".

'Chin up, Simpson, it's for the good of the firm.'

"Granberry, you're about to suffer a near-death experience!"

"Miss Jones! Clear my schedule until I get this sorted out!"

With the office space available, we have no choice but to believe in teamwork!

"I don't understand, having a pulmonary embolism isn't on his to do list!"

Exhausted employee

'No Jake, I don't want to watch you do it again.'

"I hate when she drags herself to work. Am I supposed to feel guilty?"

"No, I'm not building a raft. I'm building a double bed!"