Survivalist Humor Enthusiast Gifts

'Dibs!'

Robinson Crusoe discovered that he was not alone on the island.

This mirage was brought to you by Aqua Pure bottled water

"More rescue efforts, less screenplay."

'I'd like two pizzas, one with cheese and pepperoni and the other with cheese and sausage. One more thing, do you deliver?'

Admit it. We have a drinking problem.

'No, I didn't know it was hunting season - why do you ask?'

'If we hadn't outsourced the staff, we could've eaten them.'

"That's 'Help' with an 'H'."

'You are here' sign on desert island.

"If you got us lost ... I am so eating you first."

"What, no day spa? And you call this a luxury bunker."

'Bottled water or other non-carbonated diet beverage!'

Man looks worried, as his fellow castaway reads book: 'Cannibalism for Dummies'.

Man on desert island with a sail attached to two coconut trees.

"We both knew this day would come, Samantha... I'm leaving you and taking the kids."

'I'm kind of a survivalist myself. I roast my own coffee and distil my own gin.'

"Sure he's cute, but we should have discussed this."

"This better be high tide."

"Don't even bother – this oasis only has two and a half stars."

"I'm next time I spring for the personal Wi-Fi hotspot..."

"Darn it! No more cups!"

'I'm sorry I don't date people from other islands!'

"The problem is, you never know if they're ripe until you bite into one."

"I'm increasing your OnlyFan subscription..."

'Are you going anywhere near a chemist?'

'It's day to day, but so far I've survived,'

'Oh wait, I've got a good one! I spy with my little eye.'

Republican Beach. . . Nature Preserve rule: EAT OR BE EATEN!

'Hey, I know! -- We can dig a basement and wait till it floods!'

'You go ahead. I just don't feel like drinking this afternoon ...'

'I bet it's nice and warm inside!'

Stay in school.

NO FACILITIES

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