Survivalist Buff Gifts

'I've invented food, and I've invented shelter -- two out of three isn't so bad!'

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

Desert Island Meals.

'Thank-you God.'

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

"I dunno, looks like a trap."

Problem Solving: Man rows desert island to land.

"More rescue efforts, less screenplay."

'Arf! Arf!'

'He refuses to leave without the tree and their son.'

"Day 736. Still loving the fact that I can smoke all over this island..."

"Yes, I'm alone."

"My dream is to have a little house and a white picket fence wired with explosives."

Just a little seasoning...

"Yes, I'm sure of my 3 wishes - I wish I had a pen, I wish I had paper to write a 'rescue me' note, and I wish I had a bottle to send it in"

'I'm glad to see you've started building a boat.'

'Remember, son, don't believe any thing you hear and only half of what you see.'

Bob liked a challenge, and the shipwreck gave him something to get his teeth into.

"Is it just me, right, is it just me ...?"

Santa Claus delivers present to man stranded on desert island.

Prepper Dog

"Why can't we just have a normal home security system like the neighbours."

Desert island dweller sinks in sand.

'Do you have to be so melodramatic?'

Doug reasoned that things could be worse...but just how much worse...he wasn't sure??

Tsunami Evac Route

"It looks like a pitch for a survival-themed reality show."

A castaway on an island with an old TV that's washed ashore, sees two men in an approaching boat marked, 'TV Licensing'.

After 73 days, the coconut would finally be his.

Island and man

Unlike modern day hipsters, pre-historic hipsters didn't need to rely on yoga, hiking or even rock climbing to stay fit...

"What, no day spa? And you call this a luxury bunker."

"You never know what will catch on!"

"Keep in mind that it was put there by the sharks."

"Anyone know how to prepare sushi?"