Suntan Enthusiast Gifts

Solar-Powered Tanning Salon

'I didn't spend all that money on a suntan for nothing.'

"Suncreen's for the birds right, Oscar?!"

'Here love, do my front - I can't reach.'

it my imagination or is it getting warmer?"

Santa Claus's Mail

"Are we going for suntan, personal development or being the envy of our friends on Instagram?"

High security Santa's grotto

Rape of the Lock- The Dream

'With all the tanning lotion, sun block and moisturizers, we're more coated with batter than the onion rings!'

"I prefer to talk to Mrs. Claus. She doesn't care if I'm naughty or nice."

"I admire your enthusiasm, but you’re not really flying."

"Anything but milk and cookies."

'This year I'm deliverying everything FedEx!'

'You've got to help my son, Doctor — he's joined a cult that crawls up on beaches!'

'You still owe me the pony from last year!'

'How do we know the NSA hasn't hacked your naughty list?'

'I don't think we're devoted to the Lord. I think we're devoted to dessert.'

Santa CGI Effect

'Well no wonder it didn't work!'

"Pepperoni pizza is my favorite! Ah, Billy, you little suck up!"

'How do you think he stays so merry through the holidays?!'

'Geez, I hate these fun runs!'

"I want a pony!"

"Naughty? Nice? It's a bit more nuanced than that..."

'There really IS a Santa!' Santa busts pets eating his milk and cookies

'And that,and that,and that...'

'Well, I'll try, but cheese seems to be the 'must have gift' this year.'

"Amazon wants to open a facility here due to our friendly labor environment."

"For the last time… do not feed bubble gum to the reindeer!"

"We're wasting our time. He gets them free at work."

Why are you insisting on spending Christmas in hospital, Gran? I prefer the Santa here, darling.

The Reindeer Strike

Hot food cafe open every day except Christmas Day.

Rating the Sunset