Summer Getaway Planner Gifts

"Wait a minute - we don't have a house in the Hamptons."

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

Packed boats of families on a seaside holidays

"I can't wait for vacation - I'm going to go sun myself in a south-facing window."

Wood Stain and Sun Tan Lotion

"Eventually, you'll learn to hate your body, then love it again, then hate it—and back and forth until the beach becomes very complicated."

"My husband is taking me on a cruise, so I’m looking for a book that will help me forget that I’m on a cruise with my husband."

'This vacation, let's go on something OTHER than a power trip.'

Excess Baggage: In the old days folks called 2 weeks with 4 kids in a non-air conditioned car a vacation.

Camping.

"The best beaches are Santa Cruz, Hossegor, Ericeira, The Gold Coast, Barbados, Sennen Cove, Oahu and Bali son: They're full of surfers..."

"Two of every known creature on the planet and you forgot the pooper-scooper?"

'We've only got a couple of days to finish this box of cereal. Mom'll never let us eat something called energy-packed after school's out.'

"Actually, I hear my boss. I'm on a working vacation."

"Don't blame me, you're the one who suggested an island-hopping holiday!"

'Think, Billy - where did you bury Dad?'

'Our trip to Florida was great until Rob took us driving with the dolphins.'

Vacation Time: Hither, Thither, Yon.

"It looks brighter over there!"

Watching Sea Life.

"I'm making a list of everything we have to do before we go away so we can freak out in some kind of order."

'You know your problem, Harlan? You need to get in touch with your 'inner beach bum'.'

'In my experience, life is good most of the time, but come the holidays, they look at me as if I'm a nuisance...'

"Make a note, Ellen—one Speedo, size 54."

Only two months since school started. How long do you get off for summer break, Rudy? Oh, months and months. Just to kick back, sleep in late, have a great time with zero responsibility. Waaaa. Introduction to sarcasm. And I get tons of recess.

Superman Going On Vacation.

"Every summer I regret having used up all my vacation days in January."

"Check our website sir. It clearly says bed in breakfast."

"Free safety demonstration on board the flight?"

"Heads-up, the tourists are coming."

Working holiday.

"Are there sharks in the water?"

Travel Agency. We can afford far, and we can afford wide, but we can't afford both.

The bulb family leaves for vacation