Stretch Specialist Gifts

Yoga

'Of course I stretched first. That's how I hurt myself.'

"Wait! Don't start the chase now: I need to stretch first!:

Yoga vs. Prosecco

Biceps, muscles and brawn

"Well, at least we know she died peacefully."

"He's a dedicated lifter, but he always skips leg day."

"I'm so glad we enjoy the same style foreplay."

"How long were you in that headstand?"

'Reach up and fold down into Uttanasa.' - 'Notice how you feel both physically and spiritually.' - 'Physically, I feel that my toenails are a bit too long.' - 'Hmmm... okay, what about spiritually?'

"It's just a hunch, but you spend a lot time at your computer, don't you?"

'Would you mind terribly taking up some other sport besides long-distance running?'

Yoga Beginners Class. Breathe and stretch. That's Good. URGH! OOOF! "Yoga pants" should be something you wear and not something that happens because you can't catch your breath!

"I'm thinking of giving up yoga! Yesterday my lotus position turned into a cauliflower!"

"Go ahead, Perkins. I can listen to your report and roll out my hammies at the same time."

'Keep fit.'

"You should always stretch before engaging in strenuous activity."

Yoga. My goal in yoga is the same as the goal of defensive football players. Bend but don't break.

'OK... Technically you CAN touch your toes.'

Office Safety.

Gymnast tangled up.

"You don't need a doctor to look at your throat, you need a CHOIRPRACTOR."

Ah, geez, there goes my groin muscle again.

'It didn't hurt at all. You gave it to my teddy bear.'

"Seriously, this can't be the only stretch you know."

"Cobra pose assisted by chocolate mousse."

"Oh, man, I forgot to stretch, ever."

'...Then touch your toes twenty times.'

'See that? A pile of twigs! That's how you end up if you don't stretch properly before the game.'

Downward-facing dog vs upward-looking cat.

Gym. He claims he does that routine for an hour before starting his cardio workout. Do you believe him? It's a bit of a stretch!

Yoga

Yoga in Heaven

"Aw yeah, twist on the exhale! Twist on the exhale! Yeah yeah!!"

"Oh, gosh! Yoga in twenty minutes."