Story Time Fan Gifts

"Is the Itsy Bitsy Spider obsessive-compulsive?"

'try moderation next time!'

Teacher reading.

"According to mom the answers are all in this book!" "Too bad there's no pictures at which to look!"

The Fourth Little Pig

The Poky Little Pupa.

Saint George and the Drag Queen

"No sweetie, it’s a beurk not a book."

Monkey Curling Lion's Mane.

Little Buttercup HMS Pinafore

"I'll be a little late. I'm working a double shift."

Little Princess.

'First the dinosaurs, now this...'

"Bram Stoker's Bambi"

Humpty Dumpty goes bungee jumping.

'Put some feeling into it. I can't tell the difference between the lion and the mouse.'

Old Mother Goose Nursery Rhymes

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'

'Is this one of those deals where the names have been changed to protect the innocent?'

Biggles has a more staid adventure.

"The bear whose porridge was too hot...did he sue?"

Hansel and Gretel Day School.

This side is the gag reel.

"Because he's illiterate. That's why I have to read to him all the time."

Moby Dick

"Go figure: nobody wanted to kiss me when I was an ugly prince, but now, somehow, pretty girls are lining up!"

"Let's see. Seuss... Seuss... Here we go. That's a medium box of bagels and lox and a pop on the rocks by seven o' clock."

"Oh,oh - here comes quality time again."

"Customers who bought 'The Three Little Pigs' also bought...."

'We're out of water, Jack. Time to go back up the hill to fetch a pail.'

'I wonder how Curious George fits into all this?'

'Come on Jill, they say the water's well good.'

'Come on, girl! I know you can do it! Jump over the moon!'

"After I fix your laptop, can I have a bedtime story?"

'I told you we should have done the balloon toss.'