Story Craftsman Gifts

"He was a big man, but he moved like a cat."

"It's a heck of a tale...and well told, but we don't publish resumes."

"Bah, I could've written a better dénouement in my sleep."

I quilt therefore I am

"This is going to make the most amazing driftwood table."

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

"Yes, Jane Lyons, sitting next to Katy Jones, class of 2018, it is important for a writer to know her audience."

'He was a handsome young prince when I married him.'

"If you saw a book with the title 'An American Speaks Out,' would you buy it?"

"Do you have any knitting patterns for somebody who can only count to five?"

Potichomania (The art of decorating glass), as carried out by Master Tom in the Easter holidays.

Bad Interview Technique

"Tia Carmen, can you make a new dress for my doll?"

Man writing at laptop says: 'It's a UK road movie ??" to give it more scale, I'm making the characters three inches tall.'

Books Providing Bright Idea

Ladies reading a crochet pattern for amusement

"Writer's block?"

'Are you sure you brought the right flat pack?'

"Remorse sits in my stomach like a piece of stale bread. How does that sound?"

Woman knitting a washing line.

"Now all we need is a good script."

"Someday we will escape from this prison."

Writer's Block Party

"A plague of frogs? Awesome!"

'Styrofoam.'

A man holding a hammer watches a mummy unravel itself

Kenny's mom always made his lunch.

"My next book? It will probably be about rising up and crushing humanity."

"The first three chapters read like they were written by some guy on a couch."

Stage producer.

What's Their Secret?

Harps and Embroidery.

"Hold still, it's a programme about making your own tv cabinet."

"It's 'Architectural Digest.' "

'From the very beginning we felt that defeating the Big Bad Wolf would be meaningless unless we could parlay it into a book deal.'