Crafty Storyteller Gifts

Now, the serpent was the craftiest of all the animals in the garden.

Origami Ark

"It's amazing, Darlin', just how fast the kids grow up!"

I should be a writer when I grow up...

"Did you sleep awkwardly again?"

Swan Fairy Tales

Cat fishing whilst fish fly overhead.

The Demise of Tinkerbell

Mittens is challenged by the string.

Today's Special: Rabbit Stew

'What sort of wines do you like?' ... 'Powerful ones!'

"It that it? I don't have my contacts in."

A huge shark is about to attack a small fishing boat and one of the guys is saying 'Listen... there's that creepy music again' as an orchestra of fish, crabs and an octopus play the theme from Jaws.

"Sorry lad, ye can't be having' me pot o' toilet paper."

'My 'What I Did Over The Weekend' report is about my hunting a 17,000 pound moose, deep inside Canada.Some or all of this report has been fictionalized for dramatic purposes.'

"You know who's tougher than all your little superheroes? The fossil fuel industry."

"That's her - that's the girl who broke into our house! But her hair was 'goldier'."

"I don't see a destination called 'Veganville' sir."

'Who I played in Summer Stock.'

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

'It's cutting edge theatre.'

"On New Year's Eve, Clement and I stayed up all night drinking. Tea, of course."

"Oh, Aunt Em, it wasn't a dream. It was a place. And you and you and you ... and you were there. But not that man with the straitjacket."

'Hey, Baby! How would you like to kiss the frog formerly known as 'Prince'?'

"Hello, my name is Karl and I'm addicted to speaking to small groups of strangers."

'We're doing a fly on the wall documentary.'

After chasing the rabbit for many hours, Buster found himself very far from home indeed.

"Right now, grandmom's bark is definitely worse than her bite!"

'This court finds you guilty Mr. Jones. As your punishment, the bailiff here will slug you one.'

Kirsten Johnson

'Wait a minute! What if this isn't just a puddle?! What if it's a huge, furious hibernating snowman?'

Three little pigs-mortgage.

'Like it? I LOVED it! The narrative gripped me from the first sentence and didn't let go until the final, heart-stopping page! And the CHARACTERS! Without question, Harris, this is the finest year-end financial report you've ever written!'

'Sorry lady, can't help you: Yes, I can herd pretty much anything, but not cats, and certainly not kittens...'

'For God's sake give me some angst, how will I ever write a misery memoir?'