Stormy Storyteller Gifts

"We'll feel pretty silly if it's downgraded to a tropical storm."

"Did you sleep awkwardly again?"

Captain in a storm

"Sorry lad, ye can't be having' me pot o' toilet paper."

"Hello, my name is Karl and I'm addicted to speaking to small groups of strangers."

'We're doing a fly on the wall documentary.'

'This court finds you guilty Mr. Jones. As your punishment, the bailiff here will slug you one.'

Snowman of the Apes

"Well, sir, it looks like things are getting pretty serious for Peter and Pauline."

Daughters at Bedtime

How I met your mother

Pets in Attorney's office - 'The iguana gets everything.'

Witch dice.

"This little piggy went to market, this little piggy drove the getaway car..."

"I love this time of year."

fairy tales

"I've finally finished my lockdown novel."

'There's a little bit of my late husband in every glass - I used his ashes as a fining agent.'

Fairy tale

"I'm writing a memoir. It's mostly recipes."

Hog Futures

The Battle of the Pictures.

"Come with us to see the wizard. He can find you a brain!"

Centaur falls in love.

Chicken Funeral Planning.

"Convicts selling novels from prison? At least that could never happen here, eh Jones?"

"My dog always knows when it's about to rain."

'Miss Wilson, get on the web and find me everything on bottles!'

'I've written a poem describing my feelings on discovering the body, Inspector...'

"Hello, Number 6!"

Reading in the rain.

The Month of June

'Whoa! Must have snowed two feet last night.'

'Sure you always catch bigger fish than me. Your arms are a foot longer than mine.'

'Steroids.'