Staffing Agency Professional Gifts

When staffing agencies screw up.

"Boy, am I glad they finally hired more staff!"

Recruiting litigation lawyers is ALWAYS tricky..my last one took me to court for the emotional and professional damage I caused him by NOT considering him for a position I wasn't asked to fill.

'Let's keep in mind that although quitters never win, they often manage to avoid litigation.'

'He's written some great slogans and some great labels, but he's never written a great coupon.'

"Well, sure. We could hire some Temps, but they only live about ten days."

You can fool some of the people all of the time - "Send in some of the people, Dorothy."

'...And for the low visibility positions we can bring people on board who can, you know...do things.'

'Miss Finch, find out what she does over there and offer her twice as much to do it over here.'

'Yes I'm sure we can find an opening for you, Mr Smith!'

If you really need permanent staff for IMMEDIATE cover then we could pull out all the stops and get someone by next October.

Getting through the week.

Experience is important, so I'm inclined to leave questions of ethics to those who have them.

Ace headhunters.

'You're in luck - we do have a temporary position in advertising'.

Your resume says you were a waiter...

I'm going through your application as we speak.

'Henry has found his niche with us.'

'We're an equal opportunity employer and we do not discriminate against sex, race, religion, age, or astrological sign.'

CATCHY NAME

'Maybe we should have been a bit more specific in the ad...'

'Are these billable hours?'

I think you should go after my job!

I'm willing to start at the bottom and work my way up to your job..

'I don't want just a bunch of 'yes' men around here! Hire a couple of women!'

'Of course you're overworked and underpaid! Didn't you read the fine print in your employee's contract?'

"I'm from the Duvall Executive Search Agency, and I leave no stone unturned."

'It's true that money can't buy everything, Caldwell, but it's not healthy to dwell on it.'

"We'd like you to join our valued team of department heads."

"Why have you called the new post 'assistant deputy administrative project support?" "Because it sounded better than 'skivvy'."

'I need to hire more people. I can't keep making all of these mistakes.'

Minion of the month

'So one of your hobbies is lying, how do I know you're not telling the truth?'