Squid Aficionado Gifts

"Squid's off..."

Pygmy giant squid

"I said the males were 'evolving' – I didn't say they were 'maturing.'"

Artifishial Intelligence

"Where's all your fish?" "I never should have bought 'coy' fish."

Fish with a human in a bowl.

Clownfish entertain sea life by hitting each other in the face with octopi.

'Sorry, everyone. That last chart kind of startled me.'

"I think it loves us."

A school of fish.

Cat to fisherman about his caught fish: 'Let me clean them.'

"I wish someone would come and turn the vibrating buzzer off on that mobile phone!"

Dolphin

'How do you stop a fish from smelling?'

'CANNONBALL!!' - Whale tours.

Making fun of Starfish.

Fast Food Fly-Thru

"This place could use a moat!"

"So, what are you doing after whale-watching season?"

Whale-to-whale resuscitation

'Little is known about these amazing creatures, as there have only been a few live sightings, by giant squid scientists. Despite previous beliefs, they are actually a land animal, as the fins and respiratory system are removable.'

"Sir, our hood ornament is slowing us down."

"Give a man a fish, you cut your throat. Teach a man to fish, you're a damn fool."

Woman disposes of partner's squash kit in hazardous waste container.

Eel-mail

Topical fish have a need to keep up with current events,

Mermaid spawning time.

Hi Mom!

"It's like the other ones! I saw a shark! I saw a shark!"

'We've discovered a new breed of shark tat has evolved is dorsal fin to disguise itself,'

"When I say I'm rich I don't just mean in Omega 3 oils."

'He has high blood pressure. You'll have to keep him in a salt substitute, water tank.'

Diver

"Every year I lay a thousand eggs. Mother's Day rolls around, not a single card."

"His Apple watch may be water-resistant but he certainly isn't"