Spread Aficionado Gifts

James and I discussed at length what the best type of margarine was.

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

Satya Nutella

'That large, rolled up newspaper is a reminder - mess up in this office and you'll pay the price.'

It turns out they don't go together so well,

"Why don't you ever fetch anything good like a pizza?"

'Scroll down for the good stuff!'

'Dinner will be ready soon -- the submarine sandwiches are soaking now.'

Filling the Missile Gap

Downward arrow on progress chart goes through the floor: 'OK, I know this doesn't look good ...'

"Joe's cereal. NPR co-approved."

"The Knuckle Sandwich is good."

F&E Subs. Hey, you replaced the little swords with periscope-shaped toothpicks! Nice touch, Ernie!

As you can see, media coverage at this event is very heavy...

"I will answer anything but questions."

Destination casinos...

'The sleepover was great Mum: Timmy's house is a pigsty just like ours...'

F1 - Quit Smoking.

'This may be an old computer, but it won the March Madness office pool again and wants the money deposited in its Swiss bank account.'

'They are boneless, I didn't say anything about beaks.'

Orville Wright, not sure he wants to eat airline food, brings a sandwich to his historic first flight.

'Good news - we're merging with Mellman's Jelly and Alpine Toast.'

The sword in the all-natural impossible-to-stir peanut butter.

Leisure Editor

This Space Available.

Inventor of wheel and discoverer of fire seen on date! More (arrow). The first tabloid.

Newspaper

"Satan's on the line, sir. He says the soul you sent doesn't look like the one in the ad."

"These printers can be pretty self-righteous when they present their bills."

'They ought to change the name of this deli to The Cramer - they get it wrong 50 of the time.'

Book

Sheds

'Talk about lack of trust! My trainer didn't even bet on me, but I showed him: I won the race!'

'you just don't get the idea of being a watchdog, do you?'

'Grandpa isn't very child-friendly, is he?'