Spread Aficionado T-Shirts

James and I discussed at length what the best type of margarine was.

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

'That large, rolled up newspaper is a reminder - mess up in this office and you'll pay the price.'

"Why don't you ever fetch anything good like a pizza?"

It turns out they don't go together so well,

Filling the Missile Gap

'Dinner will be ready soon -- the submarine sandwiches are soaking now.'

'Scroll down for the good stuff!'

Downward arrow on progress chart goes through the floor: 'OK, I know this doesn't look good ...'

"Joe's cereal. NPR co-approved."

"The Knuckle Sandwich is good."

As you can see, media coverage at this event is very heavy...

"I will answer anything but questions."

F1 - Quit Smoking.

'This may be an old computer, but it won the March Madness office pool again and wants the money deposited in its Swiss bank account.'

Destination casinos...

'They are boneless, I didn't say anything about beaks.'

'The sleepover was great Mum: Timmy's house is a pigsty just like ours...'

Orville Wright, not sure he wants to eat airline food, brings a sandwich to his historic first flight.

"These printers can be pretty self-righteous when they present their bills."

Book

The sword in the all-natural impossible-to-stir peanut butter.

This Space Available.

'They ought to change the name of this deli to The Cramer - they get it wrong 50 of the time.'

Leisure Editor

Newspaper

"Satan's on the line, sir. He says the soul you sent doesn't look like the one in the ad."

Sheds

'you just don't get the idea of being a watchdog, do you?'

'Talk about lack of trust! My trainer didn't even bet on me, but I showed him: I won the race!'

'Grandpa isn't very child-friendly, is he?'

'My advice; forget the elephant in the room - focus on the Quad Demy.'