Sportswear Gifts

Designer Shoe Dwellers

'I like this one, but do you have it with the peak at the back?'

Street Fashion.

"And that's why I avoid moisture-wicking sportswear."

'Your son's sneakers called.'

Speed Dating: 'I don't think it matters how streamlined you are.'

"Do you have an indoor sports bra?"

"You can tell by the footprint... those are expensive running shoes!"

"Oh no, sweetie. I don't play. I just want to look like I do."

'I've had some baby sized clubs made.'

Venn Diagram: DIamonds

"I'm not using my jumper as a goalpost, sir, I'm using it as a jumper."

Golf Clubs Underwater.

'Top of the line sport shoes: They've improved my top speed by 0.5 kmh...'

'You mean that I have to carry them to my car?'

'Ironically, sportswear is the most comfortable clothing for doing nothing in.'

'I like to stay fit. Or at least wear a lot of lycra.'

'Oh great, now I broke a nail.'

'Actually, I was hoping for oversized with a graphite shaft'

'OK. Sometimes, after games, when I'm all alone? I... I like to dress up in a NBA uniform.'

'Now that's what I call merchandising!'

Knickers, little peaked caps, gaily striped socks - it's all so chic!

'Hello Biggo Sports Supply? About those bats I ordered.....'

'No doubt about it... serves are MUCH faster these days!'

'Trouble is, I only want to wear them for cycling to work.'

Ladies in Lycra

"We're adding to the 'home' and 'away' shirt ranges with our new 'alternate Tuesdays in March' option!"

"...and, as well as your salary, you will be eligible for company transport - a pair of our latest running shoes."

Chav a Merry Christmas

Mixing Baseball and Football

Tennis

'They're for a friend.'

Oops

"This is the new pre-season, post game, after lunch but before 4pm kit!"

"Despite what you read on social media, no, I'm not required by law to wear a jockstrap."