Sports Jokers Gifts

I'm wearing edible underwear. That's not what I mean by throw me a curve.

'Timeout! Someone poke Leonard. I don't know if he's dead or just resting between pitches.'

"This is called silent tennis? It's like regular tennis without the racket."

"Damn those dugout Martinis!"

". . . So that's 4 birdies, 1 eagle, 2 ferrets and a rabbit!"

'Hole in one!!!!'

Beer Order

Golfer wears 'How's my driving?' t-shirt.

Photobooth Photobomb

'His 5 hour energy drink timed out. If only he had taken it 3 seconds later.'

'When you said, Dream Team, I thought you meant the Swiss Bikini Team.'

Football Game Tickets. These seats are so far from the field we'll need a passport to get to them!

" ... and if we finish pillaging early enough, we can still catch the evening Zumba class on the after deck."

'In a slight change to the programme, the second year jazz quartet aren't playing 'Hello Dolly'. They are however playing truant!'

'You're allowed to pick up the ball before it stops rolling, you know.'

"Seriously, fellas, I can't get up."

National Optometrists Association. O.K., whose idea was it to form a focus group?…

'I understand the concept, sir, but I think I'd do better if it were a donut.'

Bobsled Police.

'Jim I don't think you have quite go this 'Iron Man Challenge' thing.'

"At least you made it into the hallway."

The USA football team goes on the offensive.

'When did the treadmill replace the rat race?'

Rugby oldies

'The pro told me my score of 392 is a course record!'

'First time I've seen the club go farther than the ball.'

"I think that form '10,000' steps may have been 9,999 too many!"

'Alan, it's the 11th hole, and that Tiger Woods mask isn't intimidating us...'

'And make sure you use the AUTOMATED teller, you old goat!'

'Uh-oh. They're bringing in the closer to secure the win.'

'He's started jogging to work.'

Goal Post Ape.

"On my right is Mr. Darius, who'll fill you in on our corporate counterculture."

Pinata Pranks

Offering a golfer a spade.