Sports Injury Survivor Gifts

'I don't think it's a concussion . . . although the smoke has me concerned.'

'We managed to get to the Tennis Elbow before it spread to your balls!'

'Sylvia? It's Allen. Listen, I accidentally left the shop with a knee ligament kit...Yeah, yeah, I know. I am an idiot. Anyway, could you send someone out pronto with the kit for rotator cuffs?'

The rotator cuff fairy.

'...Splints. Tape. Ice pack. Bandages....Wait! Here it is - spare brain.'

'My knee's in rehab. This one's a loaner.'

Ted's Brilliant Rugby Career Was Plagued By Nagging Injuries,

'I sprained it playing cricket.'

"Tennis elbow? Aren't we fancy?"

'Yeah - baseball, football and hockey...got concussions in all of them.'

"Is it your testimony that until the injury it had all been just fun and games?"

"That's where the pain gets me, doc."

'No, don't tell me, golf injury.'

'The knee brace I prescribed, you put on over your head.'

"After they've had hell beaten out of them they'll enjoy playing in Heaven."

"Until the plaster sets, try not to laugh."

"Chaplain, the lord should put warning labels on some of his creations."

"You'll have to help out here more. I pulled a hammy jumping over the moon."

Piano and Pianist with broken legs.

Gary turns 40.

"It's from my first fight. So make the stitches big so I'll have a gnarly scar to show off."

"L.L. Bean slippers... $25.00 Ambulance ride to hospital... $500.00 X-rays of spine... $350.00 Three refills of hydrocodone... priceless!"

Kid with plaster cast being sawn off.

'Very funny!'

STRIP Hambone: Businessman in hospital with his computer

Being Serenading in Casualty

Time Out For Teddy

"Friends have been scribbling on my cast."

'I'll clobber the first joker who ask me if I enjoyed my 'Winter Break'!'

"I was ironing the curtains and fell out of the window..!"

The lame cowboy with spurs on his crutches.

'So you're off to see the chiropodist... the only time in your life you shouldn't put your best foot forward!'

"I told him not to rely on his GPS whe out running!"

"Mom said Dad pulled a groin surfing Mendocino. When will he realize he's not 60 anymore?"

"It will be okay to hop when you go home but don't try to run."