Spooky Tales Gifts

Dustbin monster.

"I'm spooked - they don't want candy, they want ice water!"

Worm talk - 'It's so dark I can't see the hand in front of my face.'

Stormy Night

Love at First Sight

"Well, what did you expect? They were both missing vital organs."

Out To Lurch

Chiller Theatre

"Why am I always the designated driver?!"

Ghost School.

',,, and if anyone knows of a reason why these two should not be married, let them storm this castle with pitchforks and torches or forever hold their peace,'

The witch of the west again showed no water usage for the month.

Woodpecker carving pumpkins

"Son, you can't get blood from a turnip!"

"What are you kids going to be for Halloween?"

"Its been on the market for over two years. The estate agent reckons it's something to do with negative edibility!"

Tim Burton

Ghost puddle

"Do you live nearby by any chance? I hate to eat in public."

"Oh it's not haunted, it's just really old and nothing works."

'Hey, what am I, chopped liver?'

Halloween Support Group

"It's the great pumpkin's psychotic uncle Mitch, Charlie Brown."

'I hate waking up with coffin hair.'

'I don't know who you are stranger, but if you mess with big Gus you'll be in your coffin by dawn!'

"I don't care if it's a boy or a girl, as long as it's undead."

Frankenstein's Ancestry

'And then as the young rat turned around, he realized he was in the junior high, block one dissection class!'

'It's a little varietal I bottle myself...Type A positive.'

'It's been murder since it was announced that eyes of newt might be a cancer cure.'

"I lose more girlfriends that way."

Ghost frightens the photo booth.

'There's an imposter among us!'

"The Ruin is under new management. Specters will manage wraiths, shades and spirits. All others report to be spook resources. Bonuses will be based on team work and synergy."

Happy Halloween. Something's different about her. It's boo!-tox. Every Halloween its the same thing. They take candy off the house and never come to the door. That careless jerk almost trampled me! What was it? The "Heedless" Horseman! I know it's just toilet paper, but as a mummy it still gives me the creeps!