Spoiled Dog Aficionado Gifts

"You spoil that dog...."

"We're just going to have to face the fact that you're not a puppy anymore!"

Woman setting out a dinner party with name cards labeled cat person, dog person.

Why Poodles Become Killers

'Tell your boss we represent an independent watchdog committee.'

"He's fond of garlic, so his bark is much worse than his bite."

Puppy.

"I'm a retriever but I prefer 'Go-Getter'."

Who Let the Dawg In?

"Can you teach me to really bark? I only seem to be able to yap..."

'It's a dogwood tree. I can tell by it's bark.'

Dog wearing his master's shoes.

The Most Interesting Dog in the World. . .

'I know what you're thinking, honey, it's out of our price range but, wait till you see the size of the mailman's leg on this route!'

'The batter's crowding the plate. Try dusting him off at the knees. If that doesn't work, throw it high and inside. If he still won't back off, charge the plate and bite him.'

'Didn't you know that I read the comics every morning before I take the newspaper to Master?'

"I've got a lap dog and a laptop cat."

Fleas Navidad.

'Now that I've been cloned, I can sleep twice as much.'

'Thanks for helping me load the dishwasher - now would you please take the cat out before starting it up!'

K9 Litterati.

'The ranch-style house is for our wiener dog.'

"Don't you love this time of year when the squirrels taste like pumpkin spice?"

'We'd like something new and improved for dinner.'

"Miss Penny to inquire about the tardiness of evening kibble."

"You taught me how to sit, roll over and fetch, Roger. In appreciation, I'd like to share with you a few things I've learned about hedge fund management!"

"Stop coding the dog, Fred! He should have to bury his bones himself!"

"She's a model dog, alright. When she's not on a catwalk, she demands a lot of attention, requires constant grooming, and is a picky eater."

"Well, it's 3 degrees outside: let's see what excuse Master will come up with this time to cancel our walk..."

Village Pet Shop.

'I bet he can run twice as fast as you can.' 'But he has twice as many legs!'

"I'm sorry, Ma, but we're forced to sell the art collection."

Women with her children of leashes passes dog walker with dogs so well trained they have no leashes.

Balloon Dog

'What do you know about the Information Superhighway, and where do we fit in?'