Spiritual Assembler Gifts

Elydale Church: Assembly Required.

"Young Frankenstein"

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

'It all started when he tried to assemble a backyard gym without reading the instructions.'

Revival Meeting - Simultaneous translation of all talking in tongues.

"I change my mantra every two months so no one can hack my soul."

Vishnu playing twin neck guitar.

Robot arm shows charity to a laid off beggar.

Community church - the home of religion lite - Sermon: 'Atheism? You may be right!'

Caution: use only under child supervison

'I was trying to extinguish my ego, and I got an Out of Memory Error.'

'Ask about our daily sermon by fax plan.'

'I need to tell Edgar...our house sold for a million two.'

First O.M.G. church.

'He says he's tried sending you tweets but his cell phones keep melting.'

"Let there be light hors d'oeuvres."

"If he doesn't like the hand puppet routine, I'll try running the burning bush idea by him."

'Guide us, oh Webmaster.'

"For some reason I can relate to this computer that's been built with old parts."

"And the weird shall inherit the Earth, for their ways are difficult for A.I. algorithms to figure out."

Holy phone

You Have 1 New Messages

'Your late husband requests a status up date on how his stocks are doing...'

'That was so funny. I haven't booed that loudly in years.'

'Today's sermon may seem a little incoherent -- my 'Preach-o-Mat' program crashed.'

Church of divine healing - Emergency Room.

"Everyone seems to be having no trouble assembling our products. Apparently, we're making our instructions too easy."

Sea of Galilee - Please Do Not Walk On The Water.

'...and it absolutely must be assembled!'

Heaven is unattended...leave your prayers at the sound of the tone.

www.meditation.commm

Guru logs on to 'Why-fi'.

'He meditates,on the harmony of nature and the meaning of life for a few weeks, and then - Zap! - A new silicon chip.'

Angel ties a blindfold on a jet