Spiritual Assembler Prints

Elydale Church: Assembly Required.

"Young Frankenstein"

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

'It all started when he tried to assemble a backyard gym without reading the instructions.'

Revival Meeting - Simultaneous translation of all talking in tongues.

"I change my mantra every two months so no one can hack my soul."

'Because of the mess, 'Mr. Potato Salad-Head' never took off.'

Vishnu playing twin neck guitar.

Robot arm shows charity to a laid off beggar.

Community church - the home of religion lite - Sermon: 'Atheism? You may be right!'

Caution: use only under child supervison

'I was trying to extinguish my ego, and I got an Out of Memory Error.'

"I can't find the instructions."

"Let there be light hors d'oeuvres."

'He says he's tried sending you tweets but his cell phones keep melting.'

"If he doesn't like the hand puppet routine, I'll try running the burning bush idea by him."

First O.M.G. church.

'I need to tell Edgar...our house sold for a million two.'

'Ask about our daily sermon by fax plan.'

'Guide us, oh Webmaster.'

You Have 1 New Messages

"And the weird shall inherit the Earth, for their ways are difficult for A.I. algorithms to figure out."

'Your late husband requests a status up date on how his stocks are doing...'

Holy phone

"For some reason I can relate to this computer that's been built with old parts."

'That was so funny. I haven't booed that loudly in years.'

'Today's sermon may seem a little incoherent -- my 'Preach-o-Mat' program crashed.'

Church of divine healing - Emergency Room.

"Everyone seems to be having no trouble assembling our products. Apparently, we're making our instructions too easy."

'...and it absolutely must be assembled!'

Heaven is unattended...leave your prayers at the sound of the tone.

Sea of Galilee - Please Do Not Walk On The Water.

www.meditation.commm

Guru logs on to 'Why-fi'.

'He meditates,on the harmony of nature and the meaning of life for a few weeks, and then - Zap! - A new silicon chip.'