Spine Whisperer T-Shirts

'The early chiropractor.'

'My bark may be worse than my bite, but I've got a whine that will drive you up a wall!'

Support group therapy for male black widow spiders.

'Your shoe's untied.'

"I sensed you needed my help. I’m Saint &@!#%&!!, the patron saint of cursing."

My other cello is a Stradivari

Violin Practise

'He's normally not affectionate, but he's really taken a liking to you!'

Get out of the way, Harold - I'm trying to talk to Cuddles.

I used to love coming here. Nudist beach.

"Dad! The bathroom pipes are clogged up!"

I'm getting an ample full taste... I'm getting whimsical... I'm getting 'red'

"Dang, there goes another piece of the wife's good china. You see father, it's

"They play union in heaven... where do they play football?"

Snake with 'toxic' sign around it's neck.

''Normal' seems too much to shoot for ... but maybe I can keep you out of the nuthouse.'

'Bob likes to express himself through his art!'

Happy Violinist

Spiders all over the place, "Hello, Guiness book of records?"

"The sellers recommended that I burn some sage during the tour."

'Our ultrasound equipment is not working, so we've brought in famed psychic Jennifer Armstrong to give us a vision of the fetus.'

"You'll be able to talk to your husband. I have video conferencing."

"I'm the ghost of Christmas Tree Future, and honestly, it doesn't turn out well for you."

'...and where did you bury the bone?'

'U. . .S. .U. .C. .K. . . . L. . O. . L.'

'If another barman cracks the joke about not serving spirits, I'm leaving ...'

'Stop gritting your teeth!'

'I'm not hibernating there again - I got the heebie-jeebies being around so many snakes!'

'Don't you think it's strange that all snakes are Aries, Taurus or Gemini...?'

'It's my job to be nosy!'

'He's not there at the moment so please leave a message.'

'You're very tense today.'

The Four Seasonings.

Cello player has an audience of cats.

'Hold everything! -- The National Endowment for the Arts changed its mind!'