Spill Expert Gifts

Ed could talk the talk and walk the walk, but just not while carrying hot liquids.

'Shoot, this is nothing, you should have seen how good we had it back in ancient Egypt.'

"I just love how wet you've made things in here."

Pull the udder one

'It's your fault. I told you to watch that wet spot.'

"Well, you said your glasses needed cleaning!"

'What it all means is, ker-booom!'

'When does the improvement phase of this home improvement project begin?'

Oil Spill Hits Wall St.

'You know, this is the 2nd bottle of this I've opened, and I still have no idea what it tastes like.'

"They call me the king of railroad salvage - 'they' being my wife, actually."

Swimming Champion.

'We spoil that dog.'

'Sir, we've drilled so deep this time that we've reached Arab oil.'

'I finally got a grip on reality, and evidently I squeezed too hard.'

'I am prosecuting you for a breach of article 5 of the explosives act, storing black powder in a dangerous manor on unlicensed premises.'

Safety first - be aware of what is around you.

"Oh no!"

"I failed driver's ed....Apparently there's like this rule about rear-ending a police car!"

'I need something to spill.'

"And this is the ultimate in low-flush toilets!"

Algebra Research Center: Come In We're Slopin'

A Vet? I had you picked in advertising.

"An earthquake cracked the building in half. I'd have it fixed, but it's keeping the staff from constantly going to the break room."

'I thought if I tried diving, I wouldn't mind a bath so much!'

Now do you see the point of regular electrical checks?

'When I get the clumsies, switch me to a sippy-cup.'

Dive in...

"The black flies go away when the mosquitoes show up."

"Don't worry, I have another savings for your treats."

'Yeah...very nice but I still think you're spoiling him.'