Flood Expert Gifts

Anchor holding house 'Damp, what damp?'

"Liable to flooding? Whatever gives you that idea sir?"

'Dang it, I just washed this street. Boy, every time...'

'I don't care what the blueprints say, I'm certain HE strongly suggested a roof.'

Building Site - Life Jackets must be worn.

'The upside is that if the water gets high enough all your termites might drown.'

'It's your fault. I told you to watch that wet spot.'

'Jimmie, run and tell your dad the tractor is flooded.'

Wally flunks the test: The Emergency Broadcast System.

'...and the property lies in a beautiful valley by the banks of the river...'

'Expecting a bit of wet weather Reg...?'

'Two pencils approach Noah's ark.'

'I've been plagued with worry over rising water levels, so...'

Cat with all the hair he has ever shed

"I thought you meant we had a security leak."

'Have you filed an environmental impact statement for this flood?'

"Every once in a while this house comes with a pool."

Climate Change Contingency House

"When the rubber duck reaches eye level it's a flood. . . wow, brilliant!"

"....rather than spend millions on a potentially fruitless effort to avoid flooding we've decided to focus on public safety!"

'Do you suppose we might qualify for asylum in Holland?'

'Look, thanks for your concern, but I think a flood is something we can cope with!'

'Oy! Don't you realise there's a hosepipe ban?'

'I'll call you back. I'm out with the dog in the fields at the moment.'

'Well, stop watching him if it makes you stress over flood insurance.'

'Did I or did I not say, no woodworm?!'

"Hi, I'm your new neighbour. I work as a maintenance engineer on the Thames Flood Barrier."

Next train: Deluged

'I Keep Thinking it's Somerset.'

'When I get the clumsies, switch me to a sippy-cup.'

'Quite a downpour wasn't it?'

Flooding

Water Department Flood

Mexico braces for more floods.

'My basement is flooded, so I figure, why stay home and stand in water when I can go fly fishing instead?'