Flood-risk Tactician Gifts

Building Site - Life Jackets must be worn.

"Liable to flooding? Whatever gives you that idea sir?"

"We'll always have Paris..."

“Sweet mother of Marmaduke... no!”

"Memo to self - personalise new work-station."

"I intend to stay in this job, come Hell or high water."

"I can see our house from here."

'Don't worry, the first 30 years of dealing with emergency plumbing problems are the hardest.'

"I heard you're top dog in trust and loyalty training."

"I just got a text message from our dehumidifier. It says it doesn't know how much more of this rain it can take."

'Two pencils approach Noah's ark.'

Human males marking territory.

"We have to recognise that severe weather events are becoming more common. . ."

'Boy, look at his personal space!'

'I've been plagued with worry over rising water levels, so...'

"It has come to my attention that there's a traitor in our midst."

'Have you filed an environmental impact statement for this flood?'

"Every once in a while this house comes with a pool."

"Yes, Mr. Willis, it's definitely rising damp."

"....rather than spend millions on a potentially fruitless effort to avoid flooding we've decided to focus on public safety!"

'Sir, our sales force has just taken Atlanta.'

I've left your pin on the map, but I've loosened it.

Chelsea flower show sewage

'Do you suppose we might qualify for asylum in Holland?'

Honey, wake up

Stone Age

"Ned is getting ready for the oceans to rise."

They're inflatable trade barriers!

'If you can smile when everything around you is going wrong... you're probably in the repair business!'

'Should we upgrade the levees or just go hydroponic?'

'It's the plumber ... '

"Actually we were hoping for something a little more sensible..."

'It's a very nice house, when the tide is out.'

Helms Burton Titulo III

Official in flooded office says: 'A decision on lifting the hosepipe ban will be made in due course.'