Flood Survival Expert Gifts

The old woman who lives in a shoe meets a friends who says: 'My new home is built on a flood plain ??" but thankfully it's a welly.'

'Dang it, I just washed this street. Boy, every time...'

Building Site - Life Jackets must be worn.

'Rubbing sticks together was a great idea. After 40 minutes, I'm so warm I don't need a fire!'

Wally flunks the test: The Emergency Broadcast System.

"Oh no! This chimney needs re-pointing."

'I won't let global warming change my lifestyle.'

"We're going to have a post-flood economy to deal with."

Noah wears hearing protection as animals howl.

'Two pencils approach Noah's ark.'

'Well, you always said you wanted a water feature for the garden.'

Hurricane damage to trees

'Damn! I was saving that for a rainy day!'

'I've been plagued with worry over rising water levels, so...'

"Next year I'm planting rice instead of potatoes"

"Every once in a while this house comes with a pool."

'Have you filed an environmental impact statement for this flood?'

'Just when you think things can't get any worse, it starts to rain.'

"When the rubber duck reaches eye level it's a flood. . . wow, brilliant!"

"....rather than spend millions on a potentially fruitless effort to avoid flooding we've decided to focus on public safety!"

'Do you suppose we might qualify for asylum in Holland?'

"It was a professional hit..."

'Start spreading the news, I'm leaving today!'

Rashomon of West 84th Street

Message in a bottle.

'Oy! Don't you realise there's a hosepipe ban?'

Flood-stricken woman saves goldfish

'This doesn't look good!'

'Wow, it's lucky he shot at you with a rifle and not a shotgun, otherwise, you would have been a goner...'

"Then we're all agreed. We'll repair the earthquake damage to every structure in town except for this one, which we'll leave as a reminder of the dangers of shoddy construction."

Flood Rescues

'Did I or did I not say, no woodworm?!'

'Well, stop watching him if it makes you stress over flood insurance.'

'This is a fine time to think we should have bought a houseboat!'

'My basement is flooded, so I figure, why stay home and stand in water when I can go fly fishing instead?'