Speedy Texter Gifts

"Relax, that was no explosion! My daughter texting at the speed of sound caused a sonic boom."

"Russ had a novel published two hours ago and has a children's book coming out in 20 minutes."

"How sweet, you texted me. . . I love you too!"

"So this is what you do all day on your cell phone? Punching in letters...one by one...sending dirty messages to your friends?"

"I see the man who invented autocorrect has died."

Bring it on, Scrabble nerd! Want to tell him directly? What do you mean? There's a chat function so you can taunt other online Scrabble players. Just type in your insult and hit send. Have I died and gone to heaven? The internet. And I suspect it' met its match.

'Just a minute, officer. I found a loophole in this law book!'

'What am I thinking? Don't you read my Tweets?'

"Grandpa can't hear you. Turn on your caps lock."

Man reads book entitled: TXTRS DGEST.

Baby's first text.

Girl reads a book called Speed Texting For Everyday Use

I hear we're called gen txt. It's demeaning. Suggests our lives revolve 'round shallow misspelled missives. No dout! You're not helping me here. Y U usin big words? Hirz link 2 utube vid of cat pukin. Awsum!

"If you need me, I'll be in my room watching YouTube videos, texting, Skyping and blowing off my homework."

'I just got text-heckled!'

"I just sent a penny to your bank account for your thoughts."

I heard you have a really bad toothache. Meh. Not anymore. "Meh"? I got bored of that, so I just moved on. Amazing. "Mindless over matter." Bored of this phone.

"We've been avoiding it for way to long. We really need to have a face-to-face text."

Send. End.

Valentine's Day texting

'They start texting so young these days,'

"I just got a text from my teenage daughter. Do you speak emoji?"

John's Early Attempts at Direct Messaging Proved Futile.

Personal Air Bag.

"Look, it's either 50 words a minute - or 5, if you want them spelt correctly!"

"He overcame his vow of silence by texting on his phone."

The Island of People Who Never Get Back to You

A man reading whilst running.

"hey fans! im at bat,. btm 9th, bases loaded, score tied--oops, jst got called strike1!"

'You were caught texting at 95 words a minute sir!'

Kaitlyn Buchanan becomes the world's fastest text messager by texting all seven volumes of Harry Potter in 57 minutes and 12 seconds.

WRLD TXT MSG-ING CHMPSHIP.

You hang up. No, you hang up.

Night School Enrolment

'Your baby is a girl and holding a cell phone. Apparently, they're texting younger and younger these days.'